Someone got roasted

5 cups a day, my caffeinated friend. You don't take coffee breaks, you take brief intermissions from coffee.

Drip coffee. The beige cardigan of the coffee world. Dependable. Forgotten about. Present at every office. You've probably said 'I just need my coffee' to explain a personality trait.

Straight from pillow to pot. You don't wake up, you get rebooted.

Without coffee you get 'philosophical'. That's just 'tired' with better PR. You don't become deep, you become slow — and you've rebranded it beautifully.

And you openly judge other people's coffee. A drip drinker. Handing out verdicts. Bold for someone whose order we've just spent three paragraphs roasting.

See you tomorrow. You'll be back. You're always back.